Former football star Chad Johnson is in the news for refusing to participate in the divorce filed in Florida by his wife, Evelyn Lozada.  He won’t sign divorce papers or appear in court.

Instead he is trying to win back his wife.  Since his arrest for domestic violence in August, Johnson has apologized publicly, tweeted his affection for his wife and had her face tattooed on his leg.

This sounds pretty heroic, but it may be more like Don Quixote tilting at windmills.  When a spouse has taken the drastic action of filing a lawsuit for divorce, it is usually too late to change her mind.  Lozada doesn’t appear to be interested in reconciling.  And the court doesn’t need Johnson to be grant a divorce.

We all have the need for love and the need to control our surroundings.  Johnson needs to accept the premise that he cannot control this situation.  This takes time.  Lozada and her lawyers might be rushing him.