We tell our children to use their indoor voice. But sometimes we use our outdoor voice and yell at them when they are misbehaving or not doing what we want them to do or whining about something they want to do. This makes them yell back. They feel badly. We feel badly. It may correct their behavior for a short time out of fear or sadness, but it may also well up inside them and cause them to act out later.
Erin Kurt, teacher and nanny, says in this article at Lifehack.Org, the reason we yell is that we were yelled at as children. She says this is the wrong parenting choice.
We should all stop yelling at our children and instead, train ourselves to take a deep breath and then state the behavior they want from their child in a matter-of-fact, assertive tone of voice. She recommends the “time out” approach if they continue to misbehave. This is a more effective approach to parenting than yelling. I know this would make life quieter and more tranquil at my house.