Divorcing a Narcissist
Why would anyone marry a narcissist? Because they can be charismatic and charming and put on a show to make you fall in love with them. Only later will you discover the reality. It’s all about them.
Narcissists lack the capacity most of us have for empathy and emotionally recognizing the needs of others. The narcissist thrives on constant conflict to stay connected and fight for his or her own rights. They are usually oblivious to the needs of their spouse or children.
The narcissist will not forgive and move on if you divorce them. Their anger lasts for years sometimes. They cling to the narcissistic injury: “How could you do this to me?”
It is probably not possible to have an amicable divorce with a narcissist and co-parent in a reasonable way. They will disparage the other parent, make up false allegations, and resist child support because that requires giving money to their ex. Their feelings of entitlement get in the way of dividing assets fairly. They do not think about what is best for the children. They think about what is best for them.
The narcissist is not aware or conscious of their own bad behavior and feels entitled. They have excuses for everything and blames others for their actions. They are used to exploiting others to meet their own needs. The way to regain power now is in creating massive chaos in the divorce process and using the children as pawns.
Sometimes it takes two to Tango. But sometimes it takes only one. Divorcing a narcissist requires an understanding of this personality type. It may require a mental health consultant and appointment of a strong parenting coordinator for post divorce disputes.
