Someone once asked me what I valued most in a relationship. I said “peace”.
There are people who want just the opposite even though they may not realize it. Bill Eddy of the High Conflict Institute describes them like this:
“High-conflict people (HCPs) have a pattern of high-conflict behavior that increases conflict rather than reducing or resolving it. This pattern usually happens over and over again in many different situations with many different people. The issue that seems in conflict at the time is not what is increasing the conflict. The ‘issue’ is not the issue.”
He says these people have a pervasive need for conflict in their lives. They may not process conflict in their minds the same way that most people typically do nor be capable of resolving disputes. They argue with you for the sake of arguing.