Entries by James J. Gross

Fornite Cited As Cause for Divorce

Two hundred divorces in the UK since the beginning of the year have cited Fortnight as the reason for the breakup. If you don’t know what Fortnight is, your children can probably tell you.  It’s a highly addictive, time-consuming video game that can be downloaded and played for free on the Internet. My two teensage […]

The Repair Man

The repair man came to fix the washing machine on Friday.  He hooked his computer up to it and it told him that the pressure switch was faulty.  He didn’t have a pressure switch on the van.  So he went to pick one up. On Saturday, the washing machine would not start.  I called the […]

A Man and His Dog

“It’s either me or the dog,” a woman in Istanbul told her husband.  The husband had brought the dog and a parrot to their apartment. “We have a baby at home,” she declared. We can’t take care of these animals too.” The man refused to get rid of the animals.  The wife then moved into […]

The Easy Button Divorce

Lawmakers are slowly making divorce easier in Maryland, but you still have to file a complaint with the court and go to a hearing to get a divorce.  Meanwhile, England and Wales have introduced digital divorces.  Couples can apply for divorce online with a few clicks, upload supporting documents and pay court fees. During the […]


Legal Engineer

One of my first tasks as a chemical engineer at the Procter & Gamble Company was to design a tank to hold a chemical called Toluene.  I had to calculate the parameters, like pressure, volume, and flammable temperature.  I was lucky to stumble upon an unused tank on the property that would work and save […]


The King’s English

When my kids were growing up, we had an inside joke.  Whenever I corrected their grammar or slang, I told them to speak the King’s English. In today’s news, I hear of Trump’s lawyer profanely chewing out a reporter, Samantha Bee apologizing for calling the President’s daughter a profane name, and Roseanne Barr sending a […]


I Hate My Job

Eighty-five percent of workers worldwide, in an anonymous Gallup poll , said they hated their jobs. I was talking to opposing counsel last week who told me that after 30 plus years of practicing divorce law, she was going to try something else.  She said that the parties were more unreasonable, lawyers were meaner and […]

But Judge, I Won’t Make That Much Next Year!

Jason Soprovich, a real estate agent in Canada, married Monica Thiessen 17 years ago.  Jason was very successful and they lived a luxurious lifestyle during those 17 years. They were members of expensive country clubs, and their children have always gone to private school. The family took annual trips to Hawaii, Las Vegas and Los Angeles. Jason’s […]

Going Broke on a Million a Year

It is a lament divorce judges frequently hear.  Since alimony and child support are based on income, you can’t blame the judges for being somewhat cynical.  It is a law of the Universe.  Income decreases in the year of divorce. But what if you make a million dollars a year?  Carol Rose, estranged spouse of […]