Ask the divorce lawyer

In this post, divorce lawyers from Thyden Gross and Callahan answer your family law questions.

The Dispute

Q: The children didn’t have school today (Friday).  My ex says I have to pick them up at her house.  I say that she has to drop them off to me. Who’s right?

Divorce Lawyer Answer:  First let’s look at the divorce order or separation agreement if you have one.

What the Agreement Says

Q:  Our separation agreement says:  “The father shall have the children on Wednesdays and Fridays from pickup at daycare/school/camp (hereinafter referred to as “school”) or from 8:30 am for any child not attending school that day.”

Divorce Lawyer Answer:  The agreement is not clear. The drafter tried to cram too many thoughts into that one run-on sentence.  It would have been better if the sentence ended with the parenthetical.

The next sentence would read:  “The father will pick up the children from mother’s home at 8:30 am on days when they are not in school.”  Or the mother will drop them off at the father’s house.  What have you been doing so far?

Past Conduct

Q:  On the mornings that I have the kids, but it is my ex’s day, if the kids are sick, I will drop them off at my ex’s.  So on her mornings, when it is my day, she should do the same.

The issue with Fridays is that every two weeks, there is no school on Friday. Teacher development day or something. So I have it worked out with my boss, that I work from home every other Friday so I can watch the kids.  This way, it is good for both of us, I don’t lose wages, and my ex also gets to go to work and not lose wages either.

I will also not pay her lost wages claims. I told her that I will not pick them up today and she’s causing her own wage loss.  I want her to pay for my legal fees as well.

The Solution

Divorce Lawyer Answer:  I agree that you should not have to pay her for lost wages.  And I agree that both of you win and it is therefore best for the children if she drops them off on Fridays.

However, the agreement doesn’t say that, so in the event of a dispute, you either have to reach a mutual agreement or go to mediation or court.  The American Rule applies to legal fees – each pays their own.